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A pinch & a punch for the first of the month! Mr. & Mrs. BJK are entertaining tonight. A send off for an old friend of his. I did the necessary shopping for meal fixings and the rest of the prep has been delegated to The Perfect Housewife. As we speak (type), my beloved husband is at home making tandoori chicken for 12 AND cleaning up the living room. I do love him so. I’ve stopped trying match my housekeeping skills to his…I never do good enough so I’ve decided to leave things to the expert. PS What do you want to be I get the (dubious) pleasure of cleaning up after he cooks? Tag: perfect match
We’ve heard so much about online dating that we can’t forget the number of online dating services has continued to grow, but did you know that there are a number of different types of online dating services as well? First there are the general types of services that we’re most likely familiar with, those like Match.com, Yahoo! Personals and others that are similar to that. These services offer you full access to their membership database, and currently they hold the major share of the market. They also offer additional services which includes guides, online dating tips, quizzes and other options to help you narrow your search (or expand it). These are the services that the bulk of people using online dating services are using. (more…) Tag: match.com
Am I the last person on Earth to learn that eHarmony (http://www.eharmony.com) actually rejects people? Over a million people, to be specific. I assumed they just said that in order to make their service more desirable, on the theory that appearing to have higher standards would give them more of an allure. (Remember the immortal words of Groucho Marx: “I wouldn’t want to be part of any club that would have me as a member.) But a friend e-mailed me the other day and told me that HE – a nice, normal, interesting, creative single guy – got rejected. He forwarded me the eHarmony rejection message, which stated that they were unable to match him at this time, explaining:
I did some further searching and found an article by Janet Kornblum in USA Today entitled eHarmony: Heart and Soul, which discusses how Neil Clark Warren, the psychologist who founded eHarmony, has a divinity degree, and several of his books were published by conservative Christian group Focus on the Family. Interestingly, Kornblum notes that Warren started out marketing primarily to Christian sites, touting eHarmony as ‘based on the Christian principles of Focus on the Family author Dr. Neil Clark Warren.’ The connection may come as a surprise to today’s mainstream users: Nothing in Warren’s TV or radio ads…hints at his Christian background. But now Warren is trying to distance himself from that and is promoting eHarmony in a secular way, because, in his words, “we’re trying to reach the whole world — people of all spiritual orientations, all political philosophies, all racial backgrounds. Even people who can’t compose a coherent e-mail, if my experience is any indication! But Kornblum goes on to state that eHarmony does not reject on the basis of religion; it has atheists, agnostics and even Wiccans among customers, [Warren] says. And apparently his patented Compatibility Matching Systemâ„¢ does NOT consist of printing out people’s profiles, throwing them down the stairs,and pairing them up by how closely they landed next to each other, as I had suspected. Warren says his research has shown that a marriage has the greatest chance of thriving if the two people share at least ten of the 29 areas of compatibility” that eHarmony matches you on. Warren is very pro-marriage, so eHarmony is, too. He says that’s why he won’t match gay or lesbian people (which annoys me) – because they can’t legally get married. Even though so many of them want to. I came across another interesting article from May 2007 in the Washinton Post, entitled They Met Online, but Definitely Didn’t Click, in which the author, Paul Farhi, explains the main reasons eHarmony rejects people. Apparently, 30% are rejected because they’re already married. Yes – MARRIED. If you already have such questionable ethics that you’re willing to cheat on your wife or husband on-line, why is being married the one thing you’re honest about!? Crazy. 27% of applicants are under 21, and 9% gave inconsistent answers within the 258-question application. Other reasons for being turned down include having been married MORE THAN FOUR TIMES before the age of 60 – I sort of perversely admire anyone who would own up to that — and anyone who answers the questions in such a way that they seem to be clinically depressed. EHarmony and Dr. Warren claim that they don’t reject anyone on the basis of religion. But since eHarmony is so pro-marriage, I’m beginning to wonder if they’re prejudiced against people who are divorced. Although I’ve only met or e-mailed with a few guys from eHarmony, none of them had been married before. And whereas on the other dating sites, they show you in the profile whether the person is never married, divorced or widowed, eHarmony doesn’t list that on anyone’s profile. So maybe if you seem to be a little depressed, for example, but have never been married, they’ll accept you. But if you’re a little depressed and are also divorced, that’s too much. As soon as I get a chance in the next week or so, I’ll try registering as if I’m an atheist, and as if I’m divorced. I’ll let you know what happens! Links to the articles mentioned in this post: />
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